I am a full person!

I have a mental list of things I would like to do someday. Oh ya, everyone has a bucket list: “dive into the Great Barrier Reef, ride the Orient Express, live on the Amalfi Coast with nothing but a motorcycle and a backpack…”

But my bucket list isn’t waiting for the time or the money …it’s waiting for a person. I’ve decided it’s time for a new list - a today list. Rather than making a list of the things I’m going to do someday, I want to make a list of things I can only do now! And not just random things but eternal things. Thanks to Denise Copeland and Grace Digital, I listened to this video while getting ready this morning. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=paXgc0kfuH8

Of course God’s timing is always perfect. The night before I had polled my single uncle and my married 😊 father about the things that I have more freedom to do now that would be harder once married.  Last night’s devotional addressed how God responds to prayer: Yes, No, and Wait. Which of course reminded me of the Wait I received regarding marriage.

There is an active waiting though. A whole-person waiting. The waiting of a trusting child in the hands of a good good Father, putting aside their request, knowing Daddy has it all worked out.

Living life to the full. What can I do now that I can’t do later? I haven’t completed my list yet, but I’d love your input. Single sisters, what life-impacting things should we challenge ourselves with now?

Why I'm Still Single...

I used to think it was because:

• I wasn't cute enough
• My thighs weren't small enough
• I was too introverted
• My personality was boring
• I lacked excitement in the adventure
• I didn't put myself out there enough
• I was standoff-ish
• My standards were too high
• I'd mastered the "don't even think about it" face 

And the list goes on.

But if that's true, what do I do with...

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Jeremiah 29:11

And according to Genesis 1:27, I was made in the image of God!

“For you(God) created my inmost being; you knit me together in my motherʼs womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”

Psalm 139:13-14. If God knit me together, that makes me a daughter of God! 

I couldn't make the two lists align. They always seemed to clash.

But what if my singleness has nothing to do with me. (Not to say there aren't character issues to be improved.) Maybe I'm more effective for His kingdom as just me.

Our God is good! We were created to bring Him glory. The whole thing is about Him and His story. I'm still single because my ministry is stronger, more glorifying to Him as just me. Married woman have great advice, insight, and wisdom. We need that. They have been through things I have never experienced. But there are some areas where 🎶"all the single ladies" 🎶 need some insight from those running the single race with them. A married woman can no longer speak to finding true contentment and joy in the single years as effectively as a single girl. 

If I were gracefully juggling my marriage, children, dinner, bills, household repairs, and adulting in general- I'd be superwoman - but I also wouldn't be as free to do what I can do now. Bible studies, game nights, swim-parties, random large acts of giving (let's just say I have a very loose budgeting system), young ladies' socials, and other spontaneous fellowships - I couldn't do it all. Yes, I want to be in the married group one day and serving Christ faithfully in that role also! But currently we (God and I) are better as just me. Singleness is not "my fault," though I have some work to do, it's about God's glory.

A Letter to my Future Husband

In this journal I have letters to my future husband with the hope of giving it to him one day. Interesting how you can have such a heart for someone you have never met. 

Dear BB,

Periodically a situation arises that catches my attention and causes me to think about you. I start to wonder if that will be us someday, or how sweet it would be if that attribute or character trait is true of you. I usually say a little prayer, smile, and move on. 

A few weeks ago I was challenged by Proverbs 18:22 

A man’s greatest treasure is his wife— she is a gift from the Lord. (CEV)

He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD. (NIV)

I pray for you often but how much more I need to be asking God to mold me. I want to be living my life such that I am truly a gift for you one day. A beautiful gift, as our Good God intended, wrapped in the Fruit of the Spirit. No crinkles or tears and untainted by the sin of the world. A wife you will be proud to call yours.

That feat is only remotely possible by God's sovereign grace, so now I pray that He would continue to carve me into His image and help me to cooperate.

Excited to love you.